Elva Anson, M.A., MFT
Non-Fiction, Relationships, Self Help
Common-sense. Well-packaged. In addition, this book also offers a whole lot of other details which might have been at the back of your mind, but which you probably never thought deeply about.
What does this text offer us?
You’re told that the Becoming Soulmates guide will help you discover the power to make your relationship what you want it to be; to create safety and let go of defenses; to understand the language of sex; to listen so your lover will talk and talk so your lover will listen; and even twenty ways of having fun getting closer!
Author Elva is a marriage and family therapist (hence the initials alongside her name). This book is well laid out — you could just skim through it and yet learn a lot. It is an
easy read, in large-point sized text, and is narrated well.
Pages are littered with attractive logo-type texts, which say things like: Sarcasm stops communication quickly. To feel alone when you are married can be the loneliest feeling in the world. The Bible uses the words ‘to know’ to describe the consummation of sex. Relationships never stay static. Or, the longer your relationship, the more fun you can have flirting with each other.
It’s interesting to see a book peppered with words like “sex”, “God”, “responsibility” and “intimacy” sit comfortably side-by-side in this book.
Its themes deal with intimacy, creating safety through love, sex and spirituality, the language of sex (including it being a “power struggle” and “talking about sex”), how to listen so your lover will talk, how to talk so your lover will listen… and more.
One interesting chapter is how to “make differences work for you”. Ever so often, people fall in love only to realize how different they are from one another. But this need not be
something negative, as the writer tells us.
But it was the ’20 tips’ at the very end of the book that made the most practical sense. Theory and practice can be two very different worlds; but this book has all the theory
waiting for you. If only one is open to it….
Reviewed by Frederick Noronha